Dear Seeking...I read your notice in today's New York Review of Books and am moved to respond. You may receive many replies of compassion.
I lost my mother when I was 13 and her absence changed my life. I am in a 40 year marriage, I have a son and daughter, now two granddaughters. I occasionally reflect on what they have that I didn't have. People who have never known that emptiness have no idea, especially how we have self-created our lives. Have you read the two books by Hope Edelman: Motherless Daughters and Motherless Mothers? We can talk more about this if you like. By the way, I read and love dogs.
Dear Seeking... I am greatly moved by your notice in the current New York Review of Books. Maternal loss is devastating and leaves a permanent emptiness in part of life. I lost my mother when I was 13 and each passing year brings more unresolved emotions to the front of my heart. Despite that, I am in a 40 year marriage, have a daughter and son and two granddaughters and a comfortable life. I understand your need and if you like we can write and look for meaning. I sent you an email last night but my computer skills are so poor that apparently I pressed the wrong button. By the way, I also read. Jane Smiley says it takes 10 hours to read a novel and I'm trying to stay on schedule. I know about dogs. When our children were young, our family included a perfect black labrador. When my son went to college and she died, he insisted we find another dog. Our new boy is a yellow labrador and came into our family but I was the one he loved most...probably because he and I were together all of the time. So, life is a series of loves and love's losses. I hope you are well and that today will be a good day for you.